make an appointment or check my schedule
information and resources about healthy relationships and sexuality
There's so much misinformation out there, so, if I work with you, or even if I don't , I would like you to have access to some good resources about problems people typically ask me for help with. I have listed only resources am familiar with and believe are good, which is how I can recommend them to you with confidence:
Anger
books
Letting Go of Anger
Rage: A Step by Step Guide to Overcoming Explosive Anger
both by Ronald Potter-Efron
Love Without Hurt
by Steven Stosny
websites
This is some of the most effective work on anger management I know and use with my clients
Anxiety
websites
Anxiety Disorders Association of America
Asexuality
Asexual Visibility and Education Network
This organization was founded to create discussion about asexuality among sexual and asexual people, so they understand that unlike celibacy, which is a choice, asexuality is a sexual orientation, that asexual people have the same emotional needs as anyone else and are equally capable of forming intimate relationships.
Couples
websites
The link above directs you to a series of articles explaining how I often work with couples, and a workbook I use with them
books
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
by John Gottman
US
The New Rules of Marriage
both by Terrence Real
Getting Back Together
by Bettie Youngs and Massa Goetz
Should We Stay Together?
by Jeffrey H. Larson
podcasts
Interview with Marriage counseling researcher Dr. Brent Atkinson, who founded The Couples Clinic in Geneva Illinois, who trained me in his methods.
Depression
Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance
Domestic Violence
books
Love Without Hurt
by Steven Stosny
websites and hotlines
innovative books and tools to help people who find themselves angry, violent relationships
Manhattan DA's Office Domestic Violence Resources
Essential information for those in relationships where there is domestic violence
New Jersey State Department of Children and Families
has a domestic violence website and a telephone Hotline for NJ residents: call 800-572-7233 for 24-hour, seven-day-a-week access to information for domestic violence victims and others seeking information about domestic violence.
Located in Manhattan, the Bronx, Brroklyn and Queens, to provide criminal justice, civil legal, and social services all in one location for victims of domestic violence, elder abuse, and sex trafficking. Victims can meet with a prosecutor, speak with a trained counselor, and apply for housing and financial assistance in just one place. Children age 3 and up can play in a children’s room while their parents receive services. Services are free and available to all victims.Victims can get help at the Centers no matter what their immigration status or the language they speak. Staff can speak more than 30 languages and interpretation services are also available in many more languages.
If you are currently experiencing domestic violence, and live in one of the five boroughs of New York City, contact is this agency at 800-621-4673
Why Domestic Violence Victims Don't Leave
This TED talk by domestic violence survivor Leslie Morgan Steiner explains how domestic violence hurts all of us, and what we can do about it
Female Sexuality
WEBSITES:
Dodson and Ross on How To Orgasm
books
Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual Growth Program for Women
by Julia R. Heiman, Leslie Lopiccolo and Jospeh Lopiccolo
Becoming Cliterate - Orgasm Equality and Why it Matters
A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex
both by Laurie Mintz
The Elusive Orgasm: a Women's Guide to Why She Can't and How She Can
by Vivienne Cass
I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide
by Doron Solot and Marshall Miller
The Orgasm Answer Guide
by Carlos Beyer-Flores and Beverly Whipple
She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman
by Ian Kerner
When the Earth Moves: Women and Orgasm
by Mikaya Hart
Women's Anatomy of Arousal
by Sheri Winston
Come as You Are : The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life
by Emily Nagoski Ph.D.
Because it Feels Good : A Woman's Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction
by Debby Herbenick
Infidelity
books
Getting Past The Affair
by Douglas K. Snyder
The New Monogamy
by Tammy Nelson
Living and Loving After Betrayal: How to Heal from Emotional Abuse, Deceit, Infidelity and Chronic Resentment
by Steven Stosny
KINK
Come Hither: a Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex
by Gloria Brame
Consensual Sadomasochism : How to Talk About It and How to Do It Safely
by Bill Henkin
Screw the Roses, Send me Thorns
by Devon and Miller
S & M 101: A realistic Introduction
by Jay Wiseman
When Someone you Love is Kinky
by Dossie Easton and Catherine Liszt
WEBSITES
National Coalition for Sexual Freedom
information and advocacy for consenting adult sin the BDSM, fetish, leather swing, and poly communities
LBGTIQ+
books
Sex Happens: the gay men's guide to creative Intimacy
by Arlen Keith Leight
Ten Things Gay Men Can Do Can Do to Find Real Love
by Joe Kort
websites
American Institute of Bisexuality
Callen Lorde Community Health Center
Medical facility for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community as well as people living with HIV/AIDS
Founded in 1983 to provide quality health and wellness programs, and a secure place to for LGBT people come together to share knowledge and expertise and support
The Gay and Lesbian Medical Association
works to combat homophobia within the medical profession and in society at large; to promote quality health care for LGBT and HIV-positive people
support for gay and bisexual men raising children
organization of straight allies (parents, family members and friends) of Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender people working to promote equality and acceptance of LGBT people.
Columnist Dan Savage and his partner Terry started this video series with their own stories of being bullied and invited others to upload their own to YouTube
the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning youth. Suicide prevention hotline : 866-488-7386
Male Sexuality
Coping with Erectile Dysfunction: How to Regain Confidence and have Great Sex
Coping with Premature Ejaculation: How to Overcome PE, Please Your Partner and Have Great Sex
both by Barry McCarthy and Michael Metz
The New Male Sexuality
by Bernie Zilbergeld
She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide To Pleasuring a Woman
by Ian Kerner
MIXED ORIENTATION MARRIAGES
BOOKS
Bisexual and Gay Husbands: Their Stories, Their Words (Haworth Gay & Lesbian Studies)
by Fritz Klein
Is My Husband Gay, Straight or Bi? A guide for women concerned about their men
by Joe Kort
by Joanne Fleischer
WEBSITES
Provides online and face to face peer support for current or former straight partners/spouses of gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender mates and for mixed orientation couples
Painful Sex
websites
International Society for Sexual Medicine
International Society for the Study of Vulvovaginal Disease
International Pelvic Pain Society
Parenting
books
And Baby Makes Three
both by John M. Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman
Becoming A Step Family
by Patricia Papernow
Nurturing Good Children Now
When Parents Disagree and What You Can Do About It
both by Ron Taffel
OPEN Realtionships, POLYAMORY
books
The Ethical Slut
by Dossie Easton
The Jealousy Workbook: exercises and insights for managing open relationships
by Kathy Labriola
The Lesbian Polyamory Reader
Marcia Munson & Judith P. Stelboum, editors
Opening Up: a guide to creating and sustaining open relationships
by Tristan Taormino
websites
Does Polyamory Work? column by Elisabeth Schiff
Our Open Agreement website that helps people structure equitable arrangements
What is Polyamory FAQ at about.com
religious couples and sexuality
BOOKS
The Newlywed's Guide to Physical Intimacy (for Orthodox Jewish Couples)
by Jennie Rosenfeld and David S. Ribner
MEDIA
SEXUAL DESIRE DISCREPANCIES
BOOKS
Sexy Mamas: Keeping Your Sex Life Alive While Raising Kids
by Cathy Winks and Anne Seamans
Rekindling Desire: a Step by Step Program to help Low Sex and No-Sex Marraiges
Enduring Desire: Your Guide to Lifelong Intimacy
by Barry McCarthy and coauthors
Where Did My Libido Go?
by Dr. Rosie King
When Your Sex Drives Don’t Match
by Sandra Pertot
The Return of Desire
by Gina Ogden
Reclaiming Your Sexual Self
by Kathryn Hall
Sexuality and Aging
books
Older, Wiser, Sexually Smarter
by Peggy Brick, Jan Lunquist, Allysin Sandak, and Bill Tavener
Better Than I Ever Expected
Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex
both by Joan Price
Sex and Love at Midlife: It’s Better Than Ever
by Bernie Zilbergeld and George Zibergeld
Sex Ed and HOw TO
books
The Guide to Getting it On
by Paul Joannides
The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex: the Most Complete Manual Ever Written
by Anne Semans
The Joy of Sex: The Ultimate Revised Edition
websites
Ask the Sex Counselor and Ask Dr Myrtle
columns written by the owners of a sexuality boutique in Madison Wisconsin, a sexuality educator and an MD
written by an educator at Columbia University
resources, Q & A, blog and podcasts form the Kinsey Institute
film archive subscription service that promotes sexual literacy
educational films and supplies
Sexual Health
International Society for Sexual Medicine
Sexual Medicine Society of North America
SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED INFECTIONS
comprehensive HIV/AIDS resources
The Center for Disease Control & Prevention
Fact Sheets and Treatment Guidelines form the CDC
Stress management and self regulation
books
Mindfulness: an Eight Week Plan for Finding Peace in a Frantic World (book and CD
by Mark Williams, PhD and Danny Penman
Hardwiring Happiness
by Rich Hanson, PhD
A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook
by Bob Stahl and Elisha Goldstein
The Now Effect: How a Mindful Moment Can Change the Rest of Your Life
by Elisha Goldstein
The Healing Power of Breath
by Richard Brown MD
The One Thing Holding You Back: Unleashing the Power of Emotional Connection
by Rafael Cushnir
The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion : Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions
by Christopher K. Germer
websites
UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center
has an online class , guided meditation MP3s and other free resources
The author of Hardwiring Happiness, Buddha's brain and others provides numerous recordings, links and other resources
Mindfulness Meditation New York Collaborative
lists classes, resources and teachers in NYC
Substance misuse
The original 12-step group
A collection of meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous in New York City for recovering alcoholics who prefer an alternative to the emphasis on religion and Higher Power commonly encountered in most A.A. meetings.
An off shoot of Alcoholics Anonymous for friends and families of problem drinkers
a behavioral change program and national support group network for people concerned about their drinking and who desire to make positive lifestyle changes. MM empowers individuals to accept personal responsibility for choosing and maintaining their own path, whether moderation or abstinence. MM promotes early self-recognition of risky drinking behavior, when moderate drinking is a more easily achievable goal.
A secular alcoholism recovery alternative to Alcoholics Anonymous
Therapist Locators
The following links offer therapist locators, advice on what to look for in in a therapist and different approaches to therapy:
The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy Therapist Locator
Society for Sex Therapy and Research Therapist Finder
American Association of Sexuality Educators Counselors and Therapists professional locator
TRANS
books
Gender Outlaw
My Gender Workbook
by Kate Bornstein
websites
blog on gender and trans issues by Helen Boyd, journalist, lecturer and author of the acclaimed books My Husband Betty and She's Not the Man I Married
International Foundation for Gender Education
promotes acceptance for transgender people, advocates for freedom of gender expression and promote the understanding and acceptance of all people
National Center for Transgender Equality
TransActive Education & Advocacy
provides support to improve the quality of life of transgender and gender non-conforming children, youth and their families through education, services, advocacy and research
World Association for Transgender Health
Brings together diverse professionals dedicated to developing best practices and policies worldwide that promote health, research, education, respect, dignity, and equality for transgender, transsexual, and gender-variant people in all cultural settings.