IF YOU WANT TO stop having the same old fight
If you, like a lot of people, have been having the same old fight over and over and afterwords you don't even remember what it was about, it's probably time to consult a professional, just like you might see a financial consultant when you need help with long term financial planning , or a personal trainer to you get into a good workout routine. I know how hard it can be to get out of a conflict when you're stuck in it. I know that once you learn and practice specific skills you may not have thought of, you will know what to do, and know how to stay calm enough to actually do it.
Let me help you
When I work with any relationship, whether the people in it are dating, married, in a monogamous relationship, an open or polyamorous one, regardless of gender, lifestyle or other factors, I work with those involved to create the relationship they want, using solution focused conversations, and research into what those who succeed in their relationships actually do that's effective. Any therapist working with relationships should be knowledgeable about different relationship structures and practices. While much has been researched and written about what makes a relationship work, I use solution-focused conversations to learn each person's best hopes and reinforce you doing more of what's meaningful and effective for all involved.
BY SHOWING you WHAT pEople in successful relationships do differently
For those who want a roadmap or workshop approach, there is a growing body of research on what people who succeed at long term relationships do that's actually differently. I am happy to share this work developed by The Couples Clinic in Geneva Illinois to translate research in practical steps anyone can take. You can learn more about it by listening to this podcast with Dr. Brent Atkinson, who trained me in his methods.
BY HAVING Solution focused conversations with you
Traditional relationship counseling wastes precious time revisiting the argument of week, refereeing arguments in session, or trying to get partners to "behave better". By asking questions that are good ones for you answer, you become more clear about the direction you want your relationship to take. The work takes place during our conversation in session and continues after you leave. I trust you will know when you've achieved your goals.
Here's some unsolicited feedback:
"You have helped us learn the tools to get us past our stubborn ways to come up with a solution. I know that we got to this point in our relationship by working with you. I want to thank you very much. I am so glad that we met you and that we stuck it out through the good and bad times. "